...is turning into a not-so-good-sleeper. And I don't know if I can fully convey both the frustration AND heart-ache I feel, but...he has always been a great sleeper...seriously. I'm not just bragging - I'm not convinced it was me who made him be a good sleeper in the first place, so...I'm just stating a fact. Mom told me last week when she put him to bed when she was babysitting that she's never seen a child go to bed as well as he does.
Well...the last few nights have been a major struggle...which is not something I'm used to, so I really do not have a clue what to do about it. We visited my friend Mel last week for a few days, and me and Jonah shared a bed...and through the night whenever she was up to feed her babies, he'd wake up (they live in a cabin, so...every little noise is very audible!) -- he'd reach over and put his arm on me, snuggle up to me, and go back to sleep. So...now I'm wondering if sleeping with him has ruined his good sleep patterns...every night when i go to leave him in bed, he clings to me, cries for me to sleep with him and not leave...and seriously has a fit when I DO leave and close the door behind me. I don't know what to do...he's never been like this. Its infuriating on one hand, 'cause its taking an hour or more to get him settled...I'm nervous of forming bad habits and having every night from here-on in be a struggle, so I try to be firm and leave him, but his crying and yelling out to me is just too much. what do I do? anyone?
Lay with him 'til he falls asleep and hope this is just a passing phase? Be tough, give him a quick kiss goodnight, leave, and try to ignore his pleas? Punish him if he gets out of bed and cries? Cuddle him for as long as he needs?
I seriously don't know.
5 comments:
awww, it's so hard when they begin (or try to! ha!) a new phase. i think you should do two things: follow your mama's instinct is the first thing. you're probably exactly right that his trip away with you is partially to do with his latest bedtime routine. he's definitely old enough (in my opinion) to put two and two together, that cuddlin' with mama is a fun way to sleep. the second thing you should do is decide what you want. if you enjoyed the bedtime/nighttime cuddles and don't mind his sleeping with you/or needing to be cuddled to sleep, then it's ok. if, however, you won't enjoy having to cuddle him every night/all night, then I think it's ok to put your foot down and enforce his old routine. from what you've told me, he does have a stubborn streak :), so this may take awhile, but what I told my kids is that they can cuddle with mommy as much as they want when we are awake, but when it's night-night, it's night-night. works for us. doesn't work everyone. just follow your mama instincts and what route is best for you guys and stick to whatever one you choose. consistency is key either way. love you! keep us updated on sweet jonah! and you too! :)
Aw, Kristi...sorry this is such a struggle! Man, it's not easy, this parenting thing, is it?! I have no suggestions for you, really, but to tell you this: you, his mom, will know what is best for him. Some will say do this or absolutely DON'T do that. You know him far better than any other experienced mom can. And when it all boils down, he'll be putting himself to bed just fine when he's 18. :o) I know that doesn't help much. Keep in mind it IS a phase that WON'T last forever. Go with your gut, girl. And if your gut is wrong, then you will have only learned more through this process called "parenting"! Hugs to you, my friend!
Just as soon as I posted mine, Angie's post showed up...Man, that could have saved me a bunch of typing! haha! Cause I think what she said is perfect. Couldn't agree more. Nicely put, Angie!:o)
great minds think alike, rach! love it! xoxo
So whether or not Im a in the "bad parenting catagory" or not... lol.. I let Silas start sleeping in my bed September 4, 2007.. and seriously, at that time .. at almost 4 years old.. i reall thought it would pass in a few weeks.. now at 7 1/2 he still crawls into my bed at 33) ish almost every night.. its not "passed" yet... I used to give myself and actually a lot of other people gave me crap about it... but i think what angie said is so true.. If you're okay with it.. its fine. You guys make the rules for your home and for your boy.. and though habits for kids are tricky to break.. do whats best for you you and Jay.. (jonah can adjust). I am kinda regretting my decision now... lol...
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