Well -- its officially 2011 - can you believe it?! Me neither. Crazy. What a year -- I always love the beginning of a new year -- just the chance to 'start over', and look forward to what will happen that we have no way of predicting...its exciting! I have a good feeling about this year - just that it will bring some unexpected blessings and good things. Every year does, though, if we're honest, doesn't it?! We have a terrible ability to see the bad things in life sometimes, don't you think?! To focus on the difficult things, and to feel sorry for ourselves and neglect the world around us - the blessings around us. And this is a very pertinent conversation right now, just spending time with family and friends, and talking about the difficult things happening in the lives of people we love. It can be discouraging. And it is a great weight sometimes, caring for others. When there are so many needs and things that cause pain. But. I believe we are to care for each other - to give ourselves to each other, and speak truth when we need to - even when its hard, even when its hurtful...in love, of course. That's the hard thing. Our feelings and opinions get in the way, and we become arrogant and self-centered, and then don't love the way we are meant to at all. I hate that about myself at times. I want to love like Christ - to correct and encourage and discipline and rebuke and empathize and comfort and love like He does. I don't know how. Or - sometimes I do, but I do things the way I think they should be done. But...I am reminded over and over that I need to trust Him. To let Him have His way in me, so my life and my heart are filled with Him. And His love oozes out of me. So I can be the best wife, mama, sister, daughter, friend, neighbour, and person I can be. I don't have a New Year's resolution to 'be a better person', and to 'love God more' or anything. Just some thoughts I've been thinking about. I want to be a loving person. Even when I feel I am not 'loved back' the way I want to be or have expected to be. I can get so disappointed in people, in not having my expectations met. But that's not really the way God loves. If He did, we'd have no hope at all. So. I want to know Jesus better, so I can learn how He loves and let Him love through me. So, I will try to stop being so stinkin' critical of people. Myself included. I can be so hard on myself sometimes. But, what does that prove? Only that I am thinking more of myself than I should be. Its incredibly frustrating, this 'flesh' of ours.
anyways. Not what I was intending to write when I opened up my blog to post tonight.
I did, indeed, have an awesome New Year's Eve lastnight. Celebrating with Jason, Erin, Amanda, Silas, and Jonah...some of my very favorite people in the world. Eating delish food, played Dutch Blitz (i'm seriously awesome, speaking of my 'flesh' - how arrogant!) - and watching Wipe Out and other TV. And spent some more time with family today, and going to tomorrow, too. I have definetely spent a TON of time with family in the last couple weeks. And I love it.
Well, I'm all written out. Goodnight.
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