30 weeks (and definetely counting!)

Jason thinks I just forget, and that I was, indeed, uncomfortable when I was preggers with Jonah-boy, but...I KNOW - without a shadow of a doubt, that I was definetely NOT THIS uncomfortable. Mercy - I have 10 weeks, give or take, left to go...and I have had MANY moments of panic thus far in my pregnancy, counting down how many more months and weeks I have yet to go before this baby is OUT. Seriously - in the night, when I wake up to pee...sometimes its hard to go back to sleep, to lay down, and feel this active wee one inside me moving all around, inhibiting my sleep...and to not feel panicky about having a living, moving PERSON inside my belly. Isn't it the craziest thing?! I mean, really: there's a live human in.my.belly. Wild. I do love it, most of the time, but...sometimes I feel incredibly anxious about how I feel...wondering if I will ever feel GOOD again. I hate dieting - and don't have much intention of ever dieting, per se -- but...I need to get myself feeling better. January - the month of resolutions and new beginnings...couldn't come at a better time this year. Here's hoping I will NOT have a c-section this time, and will be good and ready to start MOVING again after this little one is OUT and in my arms, rather than my belly. After a month of delish food and Christmas-ing...it will be time...I can't wait.

In the meantime, however...I am trying to not beat myself up too badly for my lack of...participation, at times, in....life. ha. Like yesterday, at our family Thanksgiving...though I felt incredibly guilty most of the time, I did not do one single dish after our meal was done. I sat on the deck, soaking up every bit of breeze and sunshine while my older sister and Mom cleaned up...seems like the appropriate job for an older sister and Mom, anyways, wouldn't you agree?! Just kidding, Lor -- if you happen to read this. But -- thank you, just the same.

So -- now that I've shpeeled off some words, I will go lie this weary body down on the couch before Jonah wakes up from his nap...and before I trudge off to work. Its a rough life.