Sunday, May 15, 2011
Zombie
I've been feeling like a zombie lately...sleeping a lot, like -- a lot...and feeling like I don't have the energy to even care about what I'm missing out on. Except that I do. I feel literally like I'm in another world sometimes...and just on this weird turf, trying to figure out where I fit...I'm married and a mama...and honestly those two are my absolute favorite people to be with...but I can still feel like I want the best of both worlds, ya know? Like I want to be a part of everybody's life, hanging out with everybody, even though there are too many 'groups' to even try to be a part of all the time...and on top of working and family life, and extended family time...I'm left with...not much time. I just don't like missing out on anything, even though I know I can't be everywhere, nor do I really WANT to be...these days it seems I'm just happy to be HOME when there's actually time for the 3 of us to be together...and it makes me the happiest, but...I still feel pulled sometimes...and don't like to feel like I'm letting people down, or not investing enough in those I love. I'm just one girl. And a wife. And a mother. and a friend, and a sister, and a daughter...how can I be enough to everyone?!?! And still manage to squeeze in enough naptime in a day to survive?! ahhh. I do not know the answer. But...its almost 11:00 and...I must go to bed. Goodnight.
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5 comments:
Life can be so crazy!!! I think us mom's have all had those "zombie spells"...they come; and fortunately go, too! I hope life becomes more consistent for you soon! :o)
Allow me a minute to tell you from this side of the fence that YOU ARE NOT MISSING ANYTHING!
And if ever you feel you are being spread too thin and aren't enough for evevryone... please look back at the 2007-2010 and remember how much you gave me.., what you pulled me out of and what you kept me from... and allow me and all of us..... women who truly love you, to be there for you. :) PLus.... I am LOVING afternoon nap time at the Peen-no's. XoxoxoxoxXOXO.. you are a dear.
i agree with amanda. there is nothing i want more than to have what you sweet paulinos have.
you got it the real thang!
EB
Just stopping by to say I love yah.. and I hope today is a good good day for yo. the sun is supposed to shine and your boy could play outside for a while perhaps. :) I will bring rhubarb soemtimes soon so you can make something delish! lovies..
ditto to all the above comments! give yourself a break! you are an amazing wife, awesome mama, and the BEST friend ever. right now, you need to take care of YOU and stop overthinking everything. and that's an order. :) i love you. call me anytime. xoxoxooxo
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